Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Can you bring me the toilet please
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize