Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
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