i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
