It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize