I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize