Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
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