I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize