NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
