I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
