there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
this will be a night to untag.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
