do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
