I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
be right there i have to get my cape
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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