No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I just want to make out with him forever
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
