so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
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