I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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