I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
