ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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