she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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