The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Randomize