I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
he was CRYING into my vagina
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
So much Jack, so little girl.
Bring me that man meat
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
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