Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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