Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
