I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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