So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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