if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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