how hairy? two words: wookie tits
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
