Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
