peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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