Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
