So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
