My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
So much rum. So many feels.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
