Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
