I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize
