My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Randomize
