i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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