THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
