I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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