There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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