i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Who died my cat blue again?
Randomize
