I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
i just made my gag reflex go away.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Randomize
