): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
