It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I wear drunk well.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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