so explain again why im purple
no
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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