What a fucking waste of an outfit
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Randomize
