4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize