Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
