he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize