Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
