After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
