then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize