Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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